He Is Giving

Spread the love

+JMJ

This past week I have been praying with a focus on poverty.  What it means in my life and how the Lord is asking me to live it out.

Most of the time I associate poverty with material goods.  Give stuff away to those in need, right?  This, of course, is good.  The Lord calls us to “sell what we have and follow Him.”  But it wasn’t material things that He wanted me to focus on this week, though I, for sure, need help in that area too.  He instead drew me to something different.  A Spiritual Poverty, that allows me to truly receive the gifts He wants to give to me.

The Woman Gives To The Treasury

And Jesus sitting over against the treasury, beheld how the people cast money into the treasure, and many that were rich cast in much.  And there came a certain poor widow, and she cast in two mites, which make a farthing.  And calling His disciples together, He saith to them, “Amen, I say to you, this poor widow hath cast in more than all they who have cast into the treasure.  For all they did cast in of their abundance, but she of her want cast in all she had, even her whole living.” -Mark 12:41-44

My Contemplation

I am the woman in the scripture, with nothing to my name, but a single penny.  I am walking through the street on my way to the treasury with the intention of dropping the single penny in.  As I am walking past a group of men standing against the wall, I trip and fall.  I watch in horror, as my tiny penny rolls across the dirt and stony road.  I comes to rest at the feet of one of the men I had passed.  I watch as He leans down, picks it up, and comes to me.  He bends down and gently helps me to my feet.  It is Jesus.

I don’t say anything, but in my heart I think, “Please don’t take this penny from me.” 

He says, to my surprise, “I don’t take.  I only give,” and He hands me two pennies.

Spiritual Poverty

Of course, at first I am thinking about how much I struggle with tithing, because I always think “what if… I need that?  What if… there is an emergency?”  A conversation I have had with the Lord in the past…. A lack of trust in His care.  My pride making me focus on myself in this imagery.

But the longer I sat with it, I began to realize that I am not the focus, and He wasn’t pointing out the materialistic sense, right now.  (Maybe just gently reminding me.)  Instead He was showing me His greatness.  That He is the focus.  That nothing is truly mine, but His alone, and He graciously blesses me with it.

I see the Lord is ever-giving, even when it doesn’t seem like it.  Sometimes He gives and I reject it.  Sometimes He gives and I scorn it as not enough.  Sometimes He gives and I am ungrateful.  Sometimes He gives and it wasn’t what I wanted.  Sometimes He gives and I want Him to take it back.

I was then drawn to His charity.  The love that He so graciously showers me with, and in this contemplation multiplies in giving.  This made me think about the Greatest Commandment:

“And thou shalt love the Lord, thy God, with thy whole heart, and with thy whole soul, and with thy whole mind, and with thy whole strength.” -Mark 12:30

What does this have to do with poverty?  He revealed to me that I need to practice Poverty in the aspects of love.

Poverty of my Heart– To sacrifice my heartfelt desires, longings, and wants for Him.

Poverty of my Mind– To sacrifice the daydreams that keep me occupied and to think, instead, of Higher Things.

Poverty of my Soul or Spirit– To be content in being without consolations if the Lord allows me to be in desolation.

Poverty of my Strength–  To work for His will when I would rather do something else.

In essence it is a Poverty of my Will.  That I am called to reduce the things I want, to minimize and let them go, in order to make room for the Lord to give me His loving grace.  I cannot fully receive it, if I am full of the things I want to think, do, and love.

The widow in the scripture was all in.  She gave everything she had.  This needs to be the same in me.  To give up and leave my entire self in spiritual poverty, so that the Lord can give to me all that He desires too.

Thrive in Jesus, my Friends!

What ways does the Lord ask you to practice poverty?  What can you “give away” to make more room for the Lord in your heart?

New to Ignatian Contemplation?  Check out my Post Below to learn more! 

What is Contemplative Prayer?